This morning my five-year-old daughter said, "Mommy, I can tell you're finally getting better!"
I can't begin to tell you what that means to me, but after yesterday's post, you can have some idea. There is nothing more that I want than to be a good mother to my kids. And especially in their early years, I don't want to be the mentally, emotionally, physically exhausted mom that I have been.
A friend emailed me to ask how I have been. The last time we saw each other was when her young family visited our little family on a cross-country road trip. I remember at the time, I was so tired from preparing for them to come and stay with us. While they were here, I was exhausted at entertaining them and providing a nice place for them to stay. Afterwards, it took me weeks to recover.
At the time, I knew something was wrong, that it wasn't normal for me to be feeling that way. But my thinking was so foggy and I was feeling so out of it, that I couldn't see clearly enough to start combing through information to figure it all out.
Part of me keeps thinking, why didn't I go to my doctor sooner? But I know why I didn't - I was too tired to think! I've said it before and I'll say it again: sometimes it's easier to be sick than it is to get well.